How I Met You
by TKB14.7
Summary: Gunther Hessenheffer is in his senior year of college and lives with his two roommates, Ty and Tinka. When a friend from his cooking class gives him the idea to write a letter to someone he cares about. Like a hopeless romantic he writes it to his future wife. Question is, will he ever meet her? Or has he already met her?
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This is collaboration project… sort of. This is first time writing a story around here, sooo hope you guys enjoy it.

Disclaimer: I DO NOT OWN SHAKE IT UP.

Dear future Mrs. H,

I'm writing this for you and only you. You will be the love of my life one day, and I feel like I should share with you who I was before we met. And what better way to do that than by writing you this letter.

I got the idea of writing you a letter from Marti one of the older ladies in my cooking class. You see, I'm in my senior year of college, and I currently live with my sister, Tinka and her boyfriend, Ty. I'm not a loser, I'm living with them by choice. So I decided to take a cooking class so I wouldn't be so lonely, and I could get out of the apartment more often.

Marti is one of my best friends in cooking class, and she has delightful sense of humor. She is totally the funniest sixty year old, I've ever met. But Marti is also very wise and she told me that she read online about a good way to kill time was to write a letter to someone and never send it. That way you could express your feelings towards the person better. So this is why I'm writing you this letter.

I feel like a good way to start this letter is by telling you about what happened to me yesterday. By the way I'm not only writing you about yesterday because I have nothing else to write about… who am I kidding? I am writing this letter about yesterday because I have nothing else to write about.

Well anyways, my day as usual started at five in the morning. I like to get an early start on the day. Also because it takes time to look as sparkly as I do. Besides, I like to take time to admire myself in the mirror. I'm not self-centered though. It's just for confidence, I like to accept who I am. I also like to go out in the streets and make fun of cloned assholes who think life is about being like others. So now back to the story, Baybee.

After I left my room, I went into the kitchen to get some cereal. The kitchen was a mess. I wouldn't usually would be bothered by the mess, but Ty was on kitchen duty and I wasn't going to make it easy for him to slack off. I have no clue why I'm talking about our kitchen, but I guess it has a purpose so I'll just keep on writing.

After two hours of being awake and comfortably watching T.V., Ty and Tinka finally woke up. I didn't like the fact that they shared a room, but it was for the best. I like having my own room and Ty snores. I don't see why my sister likes him. Not because Ty is a bad guy or anything, but because they're so different. I shouldn't judge though, they have been together for a long time now and I'm writing a pathetic letter to someone I might never meet. Anyways, let's not get off topic.

So right after Ty and Tinka came out, Ty quickly sat down and got the remote. I could've let it go. But hell no! That bastard wasn't changing the channel. At least not without a fight. So I punched him in the arm, and took the remote from him. Don't worry though, we do this everyday, it's like a tradition. He just smiled and tackled me to the ground. We wrestled for some time, and we broke many things, yep just a normal morning. At the end I won. I was really hoping to get back to watching my cartoons, but Tinka had already changed the channel and was happily watching Cake Boss. " Hey! I was watching my cartoons, Tinkabell!" I told her. " The mountain goat who leaves the mountain, gets it's head chopped off," she said, " That doesn't even make sense," I said, " I know, Tinka make a joke. But I'm still not changing the channel." Like that, we ended up watching Cake Boss. Tinka was always one step ahead.

The day continued, it was a pretty normal day actually. I thought it was going to be like that for the rest of the day, but Ty changed that.

After my cooking class, I got home and the first thing I saw was Ty and a shirtless Tinka making out in the couch. The old me would have punched the heck out Ty, but by now, this was a common thing to see. So instead I started clapping, that got their attention. Ty turned around to see who was clapping, when he saw me, he said, "Oh, it's just Gunther," and he went back to kissing Tinka. My Sister pushed him away, put her shirt back on and said, "We will finish this later." Ty was about to protest but one dirty look from Tinka, shut him up. " So, why back so early, dude?" Ty said, " I ran here," I responded. " Why? Wanted to watch free porn?" Ty said, Tinka threw a pillow at him. I grabbed a beer from the fridge and said, "Nah, just wanted to catch up on my sleep."

"Dude, I thought we were going to The Shop today, you can't cancel,"

"Why not?"

"Reasons,"

"Which are?"

"Dude, just come,"

"Nah, I'm good,"

"I'M THE SUPREME OVERLORD OF SWAGGY AWESOME, THOU WILL DO AS I COMMAND!"

"No."

"You have to,"

"Nope,"

"Is part of the Broship, you don't get a say in this,"

"You set me up with a girl, didn't you? You little bastard,"

"Great so you'll be there,"

"Yes, I will,"

"Awesome, don't forget to bring a lot of money,"

"Don't worry I got it covered,"

"You don't really have a choice."

Yeah I'm easy to convince, but what's the point of disagreeing? I like to take advantage of the opportunities. Besides after that, we all just ate dinner like a family. It was the only time of the day when we all got to laugh and throw food at each other's faces. Except for the mashed potatoes, those were for special occasions. Believe it or not this story is about to get crazier.

Dressed up in a more casual attire, Tinka, Ty and me headed to The Shop ( a hot wing restaurant with a bar, located in the basement of our apartment building.) When we got there, we sat down at the very back at our table. It was actually the crappiest table there, but we all loved sitting there for some reason. We ordered the usual and Ty started telling me about the girl he set me up with after our food and drinks arrived. "Okay so one thing you need to know about this girl, she's smoking hot! Way out of your league, but desperate enough to go out on a blind date, perfect for you dude." Something you should know is that, Ty was not the perfect match maker. He would always set me up with sluts, strippers, widows, cougars, or lunatics.

"Oh, so she's a slut?" I said, and that's when Tinka said,

"No…she's not a stripper," but then she mumbled, "Well at least not anymore,"

"She's one of Tinka's hot friends," Ty added. Yeah sometimes I really wonder what my sister sees in a guy like Ty, but oh well, love is love.

"Alrighty," I said., "I guess she doesn't sound so bad, she might even be the one," (She Wasn't)

"Yeah the one for the night, dude," Ty said, "The one that goes out with a bang! Dude," Tinka elbowed him and said, "Or the right one for you, Brother Twin." Tinka was better than Ty when it came to cheer me up about my love life. Mostly because Ty made go out and do some stupid shite that I would regret the next day. But I had to admit, the date didn't turn out that bad actually.

As she entered the shop, I fell in love. She had a perfect body, and a beautiful smile, she could turn on a guy easily. But then she opened her mouth and it sort of went downhill from then on. I'm not usually judgmental when it comes to the girls I date, but when a girl comes in and say, " Woe, when they told me this was a basement, I didn't think it would be under the ground, Ewww! Like no!" I decided that Ty was right about this one. So, I got drunk that night, which is why the date wasn't that bad. Being drunk, took away my attention from Marissa talking about the reasons she hated animals and why she only ate foods without any calorie thingies. I have to admit, it was a shame I wasn't listening because what she said was fascinating. Her boobs were also fascinating. I'm beginning to question if I should be this truthful in these letters. Anyways, that night did end up with a bang.

I'm pretty sure I will never see Marissa again. Mostly because later that night, Tinka slapped the hoe for some reason and she ran out dramatically and got run over by a guy and his bicycle. Good news is, her boobs are still fascinating. After that, I thanked Tinka and she just smiled. I don't know how Ty and her spend their night, but I do know that they never left me alone. I think I should be both worry and happy about that.

It was three in the morning, but we decided to cook something up because we are just that crazy. I don't remember what we cooked, or if we acted like complete idiots, or if Ty and Tinka had sex afterwards. All I remember is that I was happy around these two, I laughed a lot, Ty ate my candy and that we broke the TV. Which is what I want to remember. I want to remember the day we broke the TV, not the day I had sex with a girl named Marissa.

I'm a pretty lucky guy, which is why I'm sure that one day, I'll find you. And when I do. I'll invite you to our apartment. Beware though, I'm pretty sure mashed potatoes will end up in your face. But that just means that I like you very much, and you will always be welcomed in this sparkly family. This is the first of many, please don't ask me about this later,

Love,

Gunther.

A/N: Yeah this is the first of many letters. Not all the chapters will be letters though. Keep on Reading, if you want. Once we update of course.


	2. Chapter 2: Jumping Down for Twin Day

A/N: We were working on other projects so , didn't get to update until now, but yeah. Here it is.

Disclaimer: I do not own shake it up

Dear Future Mrs. H,

There has been chaos in the apartment the last couple of weeks. Tinka and Ty have developed a new hate for me walking in on them. I know that I have been getting kind of clingy lately, but I was alone, and they're my only friends besides Marti. After Tinka and Ty got together, I became the third wheel. I don't really mind most of the time, as long as I'm not left out. I didn't really had to worry about that yesterday though, because it was twin day, a day were Tinka and I spend the whole day together.

It was yesterday morning and I already had my Twin Day betwinkled t-shirt on. When I came out of my room to have breakfast, I saw that Tinka didn't have her Twin Day t-shirt on. At first, I thought she had forgotten about it, but the truth was so horrifying that until today, bothers me and makes me wish I hadn't asked her about it.

"Hey, Tinkabell, why aren't you wearing your Twin Day t-shirt?" I asked

"Gunther, I've been meaning to talk to you about something," she replied

"Tinka, it's okay if you forgot, just put it on and meet me at the bar. I have the whole day planned for us," I said, "Yeah, that's what I wanted to talk to you about,"

"What is it?"

"Gunther, we are older now, and you're still my brother twin, but I have plans with Ty today,"

I couldn't believe she was ditching me for Ty! I looked over at Ty, he was just sitting there like nothing was happening. I wasn't letting this go so easily, this was just going too far, so I said, " I can't believe you're ditching me for Ty on twin day!"

"Gunther, it's just one day, we can hang out another day," she said,

"But I already had stuff planned,"

" Well then do it, with someone else," How was I suppose to do that?

"How am I suppose to do that?! I know maybe Mr. Imaginary twin can join me,"

"It's just one day!"

" Tinka if you don't come with me, I'm moving out!"

"Then start packing and don't let the goat kick you on your way out!" Unbelievable, she was kicking me out. "You're kicking me out?!"

"No! I'm letting you leave!"

"Alrighty then, I'm moving out!"

I walked straight into my room and started packing all my stuff. I decided to leave the scrapbook I had made for Ty, Tinka and I, so they could see how big of a mistake it was to let me go. After three hours, I managed to pack all my clothes. I left some behind in case Tinka asked me to come back. Which I was positive she would. I was really mad so I left without saying good-bye, but it was mainly the fact that Tinka and Ty had already left. I called a moving truck and they helped me move my stuff to Marti's apartment. Marti needed a roommate after her boyfriend went to jail, so she was more than happy to take me in.

Once I moved all my stuff in, Marti and I went to do all the fun stuff I had planned for Tinka and I.

"Marti, ready to go shopping?" I said,

"Shopping?! Oh, Gunther no wonder why that girl left you,"

"Don't girls love shopping? And I got ditched by Tinka, my sister,"

"It's even worst than I thought,"

"Well what do you suggest we do then?"

"I always wanted to go bungee jump off the Empire State building,"

"Marti, I don't think we are allowed to do that,"

"Gunther, you're such a negative nelly,"

"My name is not Nelly, it's Gunther, and how would we even do that?"

"Honey, when you're as old as I am, you meet people. I know a guy who can help us,"

"Alrighty, let's go,"

"Splendid." Yeah, jumping off the empire state building could have gone better.

We drove off in Marti's motorcycle, I rode on the side car. We ended up going to this alley were we met up with the guy who was helping us.

"Hey, Hawk," Marti said to the guy,

"Hey, Ma, long time no see," Hawk replied,

" Marti is this your son?" I asked,

"Yes, yes he is," Marti replied. Yeah this woman surprises me everyday.

"So what can I do for ya, Ma?"

Hawk was a mess, he had arm tattoes and he looked like he could kill me if he wanted to. With sunglasses and a cigar in his mouth, he looked like a guy who couldn't be trusted, yet he was Marti's son, so I trusted Marti to protect me.

"Well me and Gunther here are looking for some fun, so could you be a good boy and help your Ma jump off the empire state building?"

"No problem, Ma," " Great." The whole thing was so simple, that I have to admit, I was impressed with both Marti and Hawk.

Hawk took us to the Empire state building. We took the elevator to the top and not once did someone stop us. I usually didn't like being invisible to others, but in this occasion, it came in handy. I asked Hawk how come it was possible they let him come up here and he just told me to not worry, that he had something worked out around these places. Once we got there I asked Marti, "Marti, are you sure this is safe or legal?", " Gunther, don't worry it's going to be fun." she replied. Hawk quickly got me into a harness and I was ready to jump off. I knew there was no going back, I was starting to regret leaving the apartment today, and I guess you could say I was reflecting about my actions this morning. But what I really was thinking was, SHITE, I'm going to die, I'M TOO SPARKLY TO DIE. Still, I walked to the edge and I was about to jump, when my phone rang, It was an awkward moment, Hawk and Marti just stared at me confused. I picked up,

"Hello?"

"Gunther, where are you?" It was Tinka,

"Tinka? I'm jumping off the Empire State Building with Marti,"

"Are you really trying to kill yourself?"

"No, I'm…" Just when I was about to tell Tinka that I was bungee jumping, Marti said, "Gunther, what's taking so long? I want a turn before the cops come,"

" I'm just…wait what?!"

Before I could finish, Marti pushed me off. I was screaming at the top off my lungs. My head was spinning, but it was an awesome feeling, I was FLYING! I was FUJCKING FLYING. I was the King of SPARKLY AWESOMENESS. I was so pumped that I didn't even notice dropping my phone. I was just starting to enjoy it, when Marti and Hawk pulled me up. Apparently, the scream of a flying sparkly guy hanging from the empire state building, alerted the cops. By the time, I joined Marti and Hawk, we could hear the Police sirens. We ran to the elevator as fast as we could. When we got to the first floor, we quickly thanked Hawk and ran outside. Marti started the engine and we went off, as fast as we could.

"WOOOOOHOOOO!" I screamed with my fist up.

"Yeah! Now you're learning how to live you Sparkly buzz kill," Marti said,

"Thanks, for spending the day with me Marti, I really appreciate it,"

"Its nothing, Gunther, really. You're a great friend, you're like the son I never had,"

"Marti, isn't Hawk your son?"

" Yes, but he's nothing like you, he actually has a life," we both laughed.

"You're a good kid, Gunther," Marti said,

"You're very kind Marti,"

"I know I am, and don't worry kid, you'll find your girl someday,"

"You really think so?"

"Yes, I do." I really hope Marti is right, because if she's not, this is pretty much useless. I actually started to cry, but Marti told me to not get emotional, so I sucked it up, like a man and said, "Well, the night isn't over," "True, where are we going?" Marti asked,

"Well I made a reservation at Tinka and I's favorite restaurant,"

"Do they have good food?"

"Yes, best eyeballs in New York,"

"Okay, well let's go out for burgers and beer instead,"

"That works too." Like that, Marti and I headed to an old burger joint with an open bar, and got really drunk. That's all I remember from yesterday actually.

Today, I woke up in Marti's apartment. Tinka was right there when I woke up. We had a good conversation that actually opened my mind more than jumping off the Empire State Building, ever could.

"Tinkabell? What are you doing here?" I asked,

"I was waiting for you to wake up," she replied,

"Why?"

"I was worried about you,"

"Why do you care so much all of the sudden, I thought you replaced me with Ty,"

"Gunther, I could never replace you.""Then why did you ditch me?"

"Ty is my boyfriend, and since you moved in, you never leave us alone. I can never be alone with him," It wasn't like I watched them have sex or anything like that, she was over reacting, but she was my sister, so I just listened, " You always hang out with Ty and leave me out of things, so I have to find new friends to talk to," At this moment, I realized that Ty and I did hanged out a lot and left Tinka out of things. My eyes were finally opened and I felt pretty bad about it.

"Oh, sorry Tinkabell, I always thought that I was the one being left out, but I never noticed how I was stealing your boyfriend," she laughed,

"It's okay, Gunther, I know that you're alone and I shouldn't have ditched you on Twin Day, even if you were stealing my boyfriend,"

"It's just a day, and according to Marti, it was going to be lame the way I planned it," We both laughed,

"Oh and Gunther,"

"Yes, Tinkabell?"

"You owe me a thousand dollars,"

"A thousand dollars?! For what?"

"Bailing you out of jail,"

"What?"

It turns out that Tinka and Ty were on a date when she called to check up on me. She thought I was going to kill myself, and when she told Ty, he freaked out and called 911. The police found my broken phone and thought I was dead. For awhile everyone thought that, until they found Hawk and asked him some questions. When they found Marti and I, passed out on an alley later that night, they woke us up and attempted to arrest us. We didn't go out easy, I punched a cop and we got imprisoned until they called Ty and Tinka and they came to bail us out. After that they took us home. After hearing this story, I paid Tinka back. This whole experience was a mind opener. It was also an experience that made me realize that Tinka was always going to be there for me. Mostly because after I paid her back, she happily asked me to move back in.

"It was the scrapbook, wasn't it?" I said, she laughed.

"Yeah, sure it was," she replied. I knew exactly what I had to do.

"I'm flattered but I'm good living here with Marti, it's about time I moved out anyways,"

"Okay, but remember that I'm always one call away,"

"I know you are, Tinka," we hugged and she said,

"oh and don't worry we can have a twin afternoon if you want, to make up for yesterday,"

"I have a better idea," I said, and I sure did.

I made Ty a Twin Day t-shirt and all three of us went out to celebrate Twin Afternoon together. I know that my sister is happy with Ty, and that's all I could ever want for my sister. I'm glad she has found her especial someone and even more glad that I have them as my best friends. Even though, I might get left out a couple of times, but it's alrighty. Hopefully, I meet you soon, that way we can all spend twin day together. I also hope you would be willing to eat an eyeball, but totally understandable if you don't. It all alrighty with me. Besides, we can always just jump off the Empire State Building and get drunk at a burger joint.

Love,

Gunther

P.S. Ty puked up an eyeball.

Well this has been yet another letter from Gunther to that special someone. Hope it would be awesome to read. The excitement is just getting started. Another letter is in progress so keep on reading and stuff.


End file.
